BLOCKHEAD FOR GOVERNOR VICE PRESIDENT
Hey that wasn’t my idea.
To skip the partisan stuff, I’m gonna pretend I’m a campaign consultant who’ll work for a candidate of any party. (“Gun for hire” doesn’t work well in this context, for reasons you’ll soon see.)
Naturally I’ve had specialized training in my field, just like any professional. And while I’d have to go through my old textbooks and class notes to find it, I’m positive it included, “Don’t shoot dogs. Americans love dogs!”
Okay. Just so you know, two years before Governor Veep candidate Kristi Noem admitted blowing away her dog in a gravel pit — as she puts it, to prove she can make “tough decisions” — her publicity team told her, Don’t do it. See story here.
It’s pretty likely they had the same training my fictitious campaign consultant above did, including a lesson plan about dogs.
Despite their best efforts, they ended up with a candidate the public perceives not as decisive, but as a blockhead who doesn’t listen to advice.
(At this point some reader may dredge up, “JFK listened to advisers about Bay of Pigs, and LBJ listened to advisers about Vietnam, and look where it got them,” but those were one-offs.)
Kristi having planted her flag in the blockhead camp, even Trump isn’t stupid enough to pick her for a running mate, although her star wasn’t shining brightly even before this happened (see story here).
By the way, if you’re wondering how politicians get so rich (see photo of Obama’s post-presidential spread here, and Hillary Clinton’s digs here), the answer in many cases is book sales. Sell a lot of books and you’ll make millions.
No, nobody reads politicians’ ghostwritten books; people buy these books to display on coffee tables, to convince visitors they’re not the awful people the neighbors suspect they are.
(This reminds me of an old political joke about a New Hampshire town where everyone thought the hermit living in the woods was the town’s only Democrat, but after he died there was one less Republican vote in the next election.)
(Which books, and what’s awful, depends on where you live. In Seattle, where I live, nobody puts out “Art of the Deal” even if they have a copy. But a Lenin bio might be okay, because it shows you’re lettered in history and world affairs, without tagging you as a Bolshevik.)
In short, political books are talismans or badges, like hats, buttons, and bumper stickers. By the way, Trump ropes in cash by selling hats and merch, not books, which is smart for someone who can’t read. Someone else wrote his book “Art of the Deal” (see story here). Trump does nothing himself; if he needs plumbing fixed in one of his buildings, he hires a plumber to do the work, then doesn’t pay him (see story here).
How did he get so rich? Not by working for it. By being Fred Trump’s son, who got started in real estate by being Friedrich Heinrich Trump’s son (details here and here). The Donald’s contribution to the family fortune has been to dissipate it (see story here). However, by being a good liar, he convinced millions of Americans to put America’s fortunes and prosperity in the hands of a “successful businessman.” (Instead we got a pandemic that killed a million of us; disproportionately those who listened to Trump’s bleach, mask, and vaccine advice.)
So where am I going with this? I’m not sure myself. I’m not actually a trained campaign consultant, so I’m not trying to sell services here. I don’t work anymore, anyway. Too old for that. I guess all I’m saying in this posting is that Kristi Noem isn’t a wise old head, as she wants you to believe; she’s a blockhead.
But you didn’t need me to tell you that. It’s all over the news.
Photos: No dogs were harmed in taking these pictures; they’re “playing dead.” And if you haven’t seen the video below yet, it’s time you did.