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Their grievances aren’t your problem

Whatever Republicans were in the past, MAGA isn’t about individual freedom, or live and let live.

Frank Bruni (photo, left; profile here) is a journalist, book author, and professor. In his latest book, The Age of Grievance, published in April 2024 (get it here), he describes (at pages 17-18) a personal encounter with a MAGA follower:

“At one point in that first year of the pandemic, long before the nation’s top health officials said that it was safe not to cover our faces outdoors, I was accosted at a gas station on the Merritt Parkway in Connecticut for wearing a mask. … As I absent-mindedly pumped fuel, I heard a man shouting. Screaming is more like it. A few seconds passed before I began to register the words and realized, with a quickening pulse, that they were directed at me and that he was walking in my direction.

“Take off your f***ing mask!” he demanded. I looked away, but he kept at it, planting himself about ten feet from me. His hands curled halfway into fists. His chest was thrust forward. He fired off a fusillade of insults, calling me an “idiot,” a “moron,” a “dope.” I started trembling, stopped pumping, and retreated inside the station, just to still my heart and take a breath. From that perch of relative safety by the gum and candy bars, I could see him walk back to an enormous pickup truck with MAGA regalia. He stood beside it, glancing around. He looked to be in his midtwenties, and he was slight in build, not a pound over 150. Still, he terrified me.

“He and his truck hadn’t budged when, five minutes later, I felt I had to liberate the pump I’d used and be on my way. So I hurried to my car and the haranguing resumed: “Do you do everything you’re told?!? You’re the problem! You’re why we’re no longer free!” … I drove away as fast as I safely could. I spent the next thirty minutes staring into my rearview mirror.”

If this happened to me, I would ignore the guy, avoid eye contact, and pretend I didn’t hear. I ‘d stay calm, go about my business, and at no point engage with him. I wouldn’t flip him off, argue with him, or insult him. My first line of defense would be my cellphone. I would reach in my pocket and turn it on, be ready to call 911, and if deterrence was needed start recording.

This guy overstepped civilized boundaries. Whether Bruni wore a mask was none of his business. He was not owed any kind of response. This is what MAGA is like: Bullying, intimidating, and threatening. Trump’s grievance-filled rhetoric gives them permission to behave this way.

The best response is to walk away. Unfortunately, this leads to people breaking off friendships or avoiding certain family members (watch video here), but people do what they have to. As for the guy Bruni encountered at the gas pump, he needs to grow up. Don’t hold your breath, though. There are plenty more like him.

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