Rep. Tom Rice (R-SC; photo left, bio here) “regrets voting against certifying two states’ electoral votes” after the Capitol riot, Huffington Post reported on Wednesday, December 22, 2021 (read story here).
“In retrospect I should have voted to certify, because President Trump was responsible for the attack on the Capitol,” Rice told Politico. Uh, no, actually he should’ve done it out of respect for the voters of those states, and because there was no evidence of fraud.
But doing the right thing for the wrong reasons is at least incrementally better than doing the wrong thing for the wrong reasons. With GOP congressmen, most of whom can’t pass a junior high civics test, you have to take whatever you can get. (GOP senators are a different story; most of them can, if they want to.)
Meanwhile, the Capitol rioters appearing before judges for sentencing are sorry, too. At least the ones who’ve been trained by their lawyers. If you’re a Capitol rioter and don’t have a lawyer, here’s what you tell the judge:
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“Your Honor, I apologize for my actions that day. I’m deeply sorry for what I did. I got caught up in the moment and carried away. I know that doesn’t excuse it, and I take full responsibility for my behavior. I’m ashamed of myself. I simply want to say this was completely out of character for me. I’ve never done anything like this before and never will again. I’ll accept whatever the court determines I deserve.”
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Print this out and take it with you. It’s okay to read from it. The judge will know you’re cribbing anyway. Try to look and sound sincere. That shouldn’t be hard, because you will feel sorry when you hear what the judge has to say.
And don’t do it again. The worst thing that can happen to you is having to appear before the same judge for the same offense a second time. That’s when you’ll get the book thrown at you.