I originally posted about “SoHo Karen” here.
She’s the ditzy California Girl (photo, right) who left her iPhone in a New York rideshare car.
The Uber driver tracked her down and returned it to her, but not before she concluded a 14-year-old black kid stole it, and tackled him in a hotel lobby.
Arrest and court dates ensued, and she’s facing hate crime charges that could get her prison time.
She made things worse in a TV interview in which, among other things, she claimed to be a person of color too, and asserted she was going through as much stress as the victim and his family were.
Which probably was true. By then, she was infamous, and being stalked by papparazzi back in her home town. But it’s not a good thing to say when everybody’s sympathy is with the kid she attacked and falsely accused. It just throws more gas on the fire.
So now she’s trying Apology 2.0.
If you don’t know what that is, let me explain. It’s when a lawyer sits down with an adult client who has failed to grow up and still thinks and acts like an immature child and explains to the client how to present herself to the judge. (Lawyers can’t tell clients to lie, but they can advise a a client to say they’re real sorry, have learned their lesson, and will never do it again.)
So let’s see how this went at SoHo Karen’s court appearance on Monday, November 8, 2021.
“I just wish I had apologized differently,” she told a New York Post reporter outside the courtroom. Huh. Her lawyer didn’t tell her to say that.
A hamster a wheel must be generating the electricity powering the lightbulb over her head, because that’s about a quarter of a watt, if even that much.
This was a status hearing, and her lawyer told the judge she’s “in therapy” and “trying to schedule” anger management classes back home (see story here).
That’s good as far as it goes, but the judge will want to see something more tangible. Which leads me to this:
She needs a bigger hamster.