The-Ave.US

Heh. Sure seems so. High maintenance. Obsessed with appearance. And talks like one. As Julie Sedevy pointed out in Politico Magazine, despite his inveterate chest-pounding,

” … academic research has picked up something that thousands of hours of campaign punditry has missed completely: Donald Trump talks like a woman. He might be preoccupied with …, but the way he speaks and the actual words he uses make for a distinctly feminine style. In fact, his speaking style is more feminine by far than any other candidate … since 2004.”

Now, I can’t personally vouch for the fact that Donald Trump is actually a woman. (For the Lincoln Project’s take, click here.) It’s only as plausible as a lot of other stuff you read on the internet, that’s all. You can decide for yourself how reliable internet content is.

I think he’s a woman. 

Before you have a conniption, this is SATIRE. Fake, photoshopped (see video below), unreal. It’s an experiment to see if we can drive traffic to our website by publishing complete, total, silly, nonsensical absurdities, as rightwing websites do. We have our suspicions (see, e.g., this story, and “1981 High School Football Team Photo Leaves Little Doubt that Michelle Obama Was Born Michael Robinson” still gets about 200x as many hits as our serious articles, even after the content was removed).

So this is all in fun and for scientific research. I would never, ever, seriously assert that Donald Trump was born a girl. That’s insulting to girls.

(Ed. note: This is SATIRE. It’s NOT TRUE. For our companion SATIRE on Michelle Obama click here. It’s also NOT TRUE.)